Well hello humans. Today, I did something I didn’t think I ever would: I went to an open mic night, and performed. (To be honest, I hadn’t put much thought into it before I did one, but suddenly there was a lot of thought going into it!)
The theme was mental health as it was Mental Health Awareness Day on the 10th October (this Monday) and I wrote a poem at 1am and sent it to my friend and she sent back, “I LOVE IT. Like seriously. LOVE IT. SO good. You HAVE to read it!!” which is pretty high praise so… y’know. I signed up a slot. Someone in my flat today also read it and said that it would be good to perform. I had a fair bit of confidence, I won’t lie.
I was performing after the interval and there was some really great poetry tonight, so I was feeling a little bit scared. I dashed down to the toilet during aforementioned interval, as the person who was leading the night was coming out (cool side info: we have gender neutral loos, but it still takes some getting used to!). Anyway, as I’d been walking down the stairs I was thinking to myself, “I can’t do this. I can just go and walk out the doors right now and not come back and it’ll be okay.” I went into the toilets anyway, and basically this guy (I do know his name, but I’m not sure about putting it on here sooooo) smiled at me. That is all it took. One smile. Instead of walking out, I walked back up and I did it.
I had actually learnt the poem but I had it on paper in front of me, and I’m so glad I did because my brain was a complete blank. I was reading into a microphone but the speaker was behind me so it was a really weird sensation. I felt like I was in some sort of bubble and there was just my voice sounding weirdly distorted and the words in front that I was reading aloud that somehow had some meaning I wasn’t quite grasping at that moment in time. Despite, of course, my having written them.
A lot of people did three or four poems, but I only had one so I quickly ran back to my seat afterwards, shaking immensely with adrenaline and nerves. I tried to text my boyfriend to tell him I’d done it and couldn’t even hit the right keys!
Overall, it was an incredible experience and I know I will hopefully read at open mics in the future, but I would definitely love to go and watch some more. Give me a shout down below if you do/enjoy open mic nights too! ❤
I’m not going to publish my poem here, because I’m thinking of videoing it and putting it on YouTube. However, I will then publish that in a blog post and put the poem on that so if you can hold on for a day or two, you can read it then if you’re super curious! ;P